Lead-a-ship or Sink-a-ship

The headlines are a ablaze with negativity, the fear, the gloom, the uncertainty and all the world is filled with fear on one level or another. Some justified, some foolish and others somewhere in between. We have the anniversary of 9/11, nailbiting sporting events and various political love childs making all sorts of  questionable predictions.

Where do we stand, where do we fall and what needs to change in order for us to bend but not break. I’m a massive Rocky fan and this just rings so true with my life:

“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place It will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me or nobody is going to hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit, it is about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward, how much can you take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done!” 

Continue reading

It’s Not About Smacking! Part 2

Well, here we go, part 2.

I think its important to note that as much as our children will need grace from both God and ourselves, we will need grace from them. We are not perfect, we will get it wrong, sometimes horribly. But I believe that so long as the driving force behind your actions is a Godly love for you child, a deep desire to see them grow into all that God has planned and to not let anything get in the way of seeing Gods plan for their lives unfold before them, even if it is themselves, then we will be able to correct any miscalculations in our course as parents.

My Dad didn’t hit us as children, or at least I can’t remember, but he had a look that stopped us dead. The mere thought or warning of this look made us behave, well it made me behave, I can’t speak for my brother. But, even that is not enough as it is an external motivator. We need to train our children to be internally motivated to what is right, so that even when everything around them is saying do this or do that, their default setting, their point of reference is an internal compass informed by what they have learnt.
Continue reading

It’s Not About Smacking! Part 1

A few weeks ago I wrote a blog entitled “Stop naffhousing the kids!” I had some questions regarding where is correction dealt with in the bible, so here we go.

I have been reading a book by Larry Tomczak called God, the Rod and your child’s bod, and I have been greatly encouraged and stretched and educated and, and and and…

I believe in smacking, but have been enlightened and encouraged by the fact that, it’s not really about smacking at all, it’s about biblical correction in the context of a loving relationship between parent and child. All who see and have experienced “smacking” and have become resentful, angry, disillusioned, frustrated, hurt, abused etc, must understand that their experience is not biblical correction but being at the receiving end of someone who had authority over you, expressing their idea of correction, not in love, but in hurt, retaliation and anger.

So, let’s get into it. I have taken many of the ideas below from Larry’s book, so get hold of one!

Remember this:

“IT’S BETTER TO BUILD CHILDREN THAN TO REPAIR MEN!”

L. Tomczak

Continue reading